New Year, New Stress, New...

Well, so much for this online gig being enough to make me more likely to "write" in my journal. It has been lets see almost 3 weeks. Well, my house is finshed, as far as the floors, and everything scrubbed and put back together, but the laundry has suffered. I have gone back to school without my assistant I had last year. Who I will and do miss terribly already. I am afraid my new one is going to have to be walked through everything, but I am not sure yet I am hoping it is just that she is new and unsure. Inservice was boring as usual. At least the baby didn't cry...that is utnil the first day I actually had students and then she had to be pried away kicking and screaming. Yuck of course when I couldn't cry about it for 2 hours straight, but instead had to go strait in to 7 kids thinking of crying themselves and their parents. I cant complain about the students, so far they are not bad, but then I have only met half of them. A

Also one that was coming isn't so I am getting a new one so I had to remake all my stuff for him. If all this wasnt enough, hubs is gone on a trip to Michigan with his work crew to build the boss a cabin on the lake to hunt from. I hate that he is gone. I miss him so bad, and the kids are terrible. Babydoll has been hunting him and yelling for him for 2 days and the other two are pitiful they are sobbing around and carrying his pillow, and fighting because they are on edge. To top it off it is a remote spot, so our contact with him is very limited. I cant stand it and first it was they'd be back Monday or Tuesday, and then now his boss isn't sure he'll be done by then and it might be Wednesday, my question is when does it end, 3 weeks from now. Geez, not again that is all I know. I can't wait for him to be back home and things to settle down/in at work Ick, must go there is laundry to do.

It Has to Begin Somewhere

I am nearing the end of my summer vacation. I am excited to meet my new students, but I am also dreading being away from my kiddo's everyday. My older girls are such fun, and I always feel like we have not done enough to encompass a good summer when it is over and time for school. And then there's the baby. Oh, how I could hardly stand to leave her scrumptiously fat little tiny babiness last year. This year is totally different though. She is such a little person, and that makes her harder to leave in some ways if that is possible. I felt last year like I was leaving my heart on the kitchen table everytime I went to work.Her baby antics are totally adorable and she is so fond of me after our summer together. This will be fleeting I know. It is like when she wanted nothing more than to be held by me at Christmas break last year. I knew it would be different by the next time I was off with her and it was. She was totally in to crawling by then. I fear once she is not with me all day for a while she will loose interest. I also nearly have her weaned which is adding to my melancholic sadness to be going back to work. I am so blessed that my Grandmother keeps her, but I still miss her when I am not with her. So soon, she will be off to school and then as it seems with all kids, they are never completely yours again. So much changes once they go. Now it is still 4 years away, but I am no fool at how soon her sisters reached that age and are now about to enter 1st and 3rd grades. I know before I can turn around twice I will no longer be the mother of a small child, a preschooler. I am already not the mother of a little baby and it is bittersweet for sure. Anyway, I am always thinking I should keep a diary and I never seem to be able to. I thought perhaps this would encourage me more knowing it was online and all. I will stop my semi depressive dish for the evening.